I am Married to Mr. Mom

For those of who don't know, currently my husband is working from home. And by working from home, I mean looking for work from home. That is right, like half of America, my husband has been laid of his job. I think it has been about three weeks now he has been home and I have a sinking feeling that I might be married to Mr. Mom (think Michael Keaton from the 80's flick.) First of all, the facial hair. The facial hair that drives me bonkers. My husband is usually a very handsome, clean shaven man, but since he does not have to go to "work," everyday, he is letting his mustache grow out. Grrr... Then there is the fact that last night he told me I was going to have to give up my woobie. Woobie being the 3rd pillow I had been using during my bronchitis nights to keep myself propped up. And finally, when I arrived home from work today, I found him decked out in a coordinating grey sweatsuit. I HATE sweats, to me they are like one step away from giving up on life completely. And my wonderful husband had a coordinating sweat outfit on...
If I come home tomorrow and he is playing poker with the neighbor ladies for coupons...I am in BIG trouble.

Bagels vs Staches....

2009 has been a rough year so far for me, health wise. I started back to work with what I thought was a cold and it turned out to be bronchitis. Bronchitis that gave me an amazing smoker's voice and a raspy-ass cough for weeks. No sooner did I get over that, but I got some God-awful stomach virus that threatened to defeat me. I am not joking, I was out of commission for a nice week with this crap(figuratively and literally). During this time, my loving husband was AMAZING! He would take care of me, get me drinks, get me tissues, provide me with chick flicks and watch them with me, etc. However, during my stomach virus, I asked him if he minded getting me a bagel from Panera, which would require him to get dressed, leave our warm home, go out into the cold, and drive to Panera...well, you get the picture. He lovingly looks at me (and I look like a complete mess by the way,) and says, "anything for you." OMG! How sweet was that? I wanted to cry...and I am not an emotional person. But then I began to think??? Anything for me? How about shaving that RIDICULOUS mustache thing you have been growing that I absolutely despise, that I have been begging you to shave. Nope...I can have a bagel. I see where I stand.

Brown Sugar Baby

For those of you who don't know...I am trying several different things as of late, one thing is a budget, the second is dressing for the job I want, not the one I currently have. With this being said...I present you Brown Sugar.
So in my attempts to dress more professionally, I recently purchased a super cute dress from Gap.com. I had tried it on in the Gap store, but it was cheaper on line (ahh....the budget!) So I purchased this adorable dress...and then decided that it would look more professional if I wore hosiery and pumps versus tights and black boots. So while at the grocery on Sunday, I perused the hosiery section. My how things have changed since I had to wear hose everyday. Those puppies are expensive. So when checking out the selection, I noticed that there were these "Brown Sugar," ones aimed at a certain type of person,let's just say the Cosby's....and they were a lot less...$1.99 versus all the others starting at $3.99 and going up in to the $7range....And there were black colored Brown Sugar hose...and I thought to myself...what a fantastic find...who cares what color you are underneath black hose....Ahh...budget!
So I purchased my first pair of Brown Sugar's....quite proud of myself...both for bridging the racial gap by buying them and by saving a couple of dollars at the same time.
And this morning I put on my cute dress and opened my Brown Sugars....Oh Lord Almighty....Ladies, I have gotten what I paid for...My brown sugars are well....much like sandpaper....and the crotch (sorry, I cannot think of a better word for it.) is about 5inches below were it is supposed to be. The sandpaper effect makes issues with tearing and catching...so I look somewhat like I have teeny tiny white dots everywhere...but that is just were the sandpapering giving a little more. And I am afraid my brut strength when pulling them up will rip them to shreads, so bathroom trips will be limited today...
And on top of that...I have a meeting with my Vice President today...which means I am going to have to go to the convenience store here in the building and buy a pair of $10 hose...and so my idea of paying a couple of bucks less has cost me more...
Yikes what is a girl to do....

I am just saying...The very first time....

I have decided that I need to capture all the crazy, wonderful things to that happen to me on a daily basis. I believe I know the root of cause of most of this...but I will leave that up to my readers to discover.